Written by j.w.
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Friday, 21 January 2011

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Resignation Shocker

Alan Johnson has resigned over the Police Constable who is rumoured to had all night lie ins with lonely Mrs Johnson when her husband was at all night sittings.

As if this wasn't shock enough Andy Coulson has resigned as Director of Communcations with David Cameron because of the continuing phone hacking stories relating to his old job as editor of the News of the World. Coulson said he would only leave Downing Street when he felt Cameron could cope without him.

I am resigned into accepting that Tony Blair will never own up to his responsibility over the misdirection of his Cabinet and his country over the legality of the Iraq War.

Alan Johnson struggled to be a shadow Chancellor of the Exchequer. In all honesty I think this reporter knows a bit more about economics than he does and I only filled the back of a postage stamp with what I know.

So we have Ed Balls. Not someone who my mother would call 'a nice young man' but maybe a darn sight more effective at wiping the smirk from the Coalition creeps like Osborne and Gove, let alone smoothie PR man David Cameron.

The replacement for Andy Coulson in Downing Street is likely to be fiercely contested. Tony Blair fresh from his triumphs at the Iraq enquiry would be just the man for the job but he is a red hot Socialist, Jamie Oliver would be a natural but he would need his pal Hardy to come along as well so they could cook up another fine mess for all of us to get us into.

But the obvious choice is Avram Grant manager of West Ham (as I write) who would surely bring his art of Communication to the aid of the Coalition.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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