Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Police, Murder, Pizza

Thursday, 20 January 2011

image for Jo Yeates Murder: Man Arrested After Confession
Police searching for pizza crumbs

Police investigating the murder of Jo Yeates in Bristol have arrested a 32-year-old man after receiving evidence from eyewitnesses who said that he had confessed to friends that he liked eating mozzarella, tomato and pesto pizza from Tesco.

The man, as yet unnamed, was drinking with some friends outside the Bargain Booze shop from where Miss Yeates bought her booze on her way home. Miss Yeates was killed on Christmas Day, which is rotten luck.

Being murdered any day of the year is rotten luck, of course, but it seems that much more sad to be snuffed out on the anniversary of the birth of Our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

The pizza flavour described is the one which Miss Yeates bought on her way home, and police say the information received from the eyewitnesses with regard to the man outside Bargain Booze is too much of a coincidence to ignore.

A police spokesman said:

"Based on the flimsy evidence we have about him liking mozzarella, tomato and pesto pizzas, we believe we've got our man, although we could be wrong."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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