Written by Monkey Woods
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Tuesday, 28 December 2010

image for Vuvuzela Found Under Boy's Bed
The Soweto Youth Orchestra Vuvuzela Rhythm Section this morning

In what has been described as "nothing short of an everyday occurrence", a woman in the Potteries yesterday discovered another amazing item under her 9-year-old son's bed - a vuvuzela!

Karen Low-Cal, 45, from Stoke, was rummaging about under Child C's bed as usual, when she found the trumpet-like instrument. She wasn't shocked at all, as she explains:

"I wasn't shocked at all."

The vuvuzela first shot to fame during the 2010 football World Cup finals in South Africa, when one of them was found shoved up a man's arse in Johannesburg after the South Africa v. Uruguay match, which the South Americans won 3-0.

Of course, it did them no good, as they were later knocked out at the semi-final stage by the Netherlands, who beat them 3-2.

The Dutch, themselves, were then beaten 1-0 by Spain in the Final with a 116th-minute goal by Andres Iniesta.

The find has led to much speculation, but, at this stage, it's too early to speculate upon what that speculation might speculate upon, and to exactly what degree it has been speculated.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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