HM Government, London: Following the revelation that Vince Cable is the 'nuclear option', Britain's independent nuclear deterrent will be upgraded next year, using Vince Cable's 'headless' war heads.
Vince Cable, also known as the 'minute man', a here today, gone tomorrow politician, will be taking over this role after stepping down as Business Secretary in the Coalition Cabinet, next year.
Britain's Trident submarines will be recalled, all the Trident missiles will be removed and decommissioned, to be replaced with Vince Cable's 'nuclear option'.
The Ministery of Defence confirmed that Vince Cables' 'nuclear option' has been given the 'go ahead', but when questioned further as to when and where Vince Cable's 'nuclear option' was stringently tested, declined to make a further comment.
Rumours had been circulating for some time, that Vince Cable had been spending many hours inside his garden shed at his London hone in Twickenham. The term 'garden shed' should be loosely used, as it is the entrance to a labyrinth of under ground bunkers, that 'reputedly' stretches from the Thames up to the Tyne in Newcastle.
Vince Cable's 'nuclear option' is alleged to have been developed and stored in Vince Cables' Twickenham garden shed bunker system. As Vince Cable has already stated;
- "They know I have nuclear weapons..."
Of course all this comes under the HM Governments' Official Secrets Act, but there has been a wide range of speculation, that Vince Cables' Twickenham garden shed bunker system, is the home to very old scientists from Hitler's Germany, the old Soviet Union and from US Nationals that have defected from the United States of America.