Written by j.w.
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Thursday, 16 December 2010

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Asssange Residence in Norfolk/Suffolk

A Judge has risked his life by allowing Julian 'WikiLeaks' Assange out of prison on bail. Despite the efforts of the Crown Prosecution Service, working on behalf of Sweden and America, Assange was granted bail only on condition that he stayed in a castle in remote Suffolk or Norfolk. The police are worried that Assange may move between Suffolk and Norfolk as neither county is quite sure which county the castle is in.

Sureties for Assange, paid in cash, are being assembled as we write. The policeman counting the money keeps on getting muddled over the amount of money as someone stuffs handfulls of cash into their pockets. An ankle bracelet for Assange is also required and the police can't find one that will fit and the key that fixes the equipment keeps getting lost.

But justice will prevail - eventually.

Can we be sure Julian Assange will remain in Britain? Will be wrench the bracelet from his leg, escape from a castle window and defeat the Sheriff of Norfol (or Suffolk)? Will his merry band hide him in a wood before he leaps into a passing flying saucer to avoid the hand of justice?

These questions worry many. In fact sleepless nights are being experienced at what might happen next. If this genius is able to return to a computer will anyone (powerful) be safe?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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