Prince Charles, recovering from the assault on his car on the way to the Royal Variety Show, declared today that the student protesters 'may have a point'. 'Their variety performance was a darned sight more entertaining than the ghastly turns at the Circus I had to go to.'
Meanwhile Queen Camilla (in waiting) joked that there was a 'first time for anything'. 'The first of many' mumbled Charles in her ear.
Students were at one condemning the attack on Charles and Camilla's car. 'What an appalling diversion from our campaign to stop the increase in student fees. We shall be labelled republicans and be extradited to America!' Well, yes there was that one - another one was rumoured to be among a crowd of jubilant young folk but on further enquiry he was a worker at Topshop who had got caught up in the whole affair.
Nick Clegg celebrated his victory in the House of Commons at a Party held at a secret location with invited guests. Several of his fellow MP's couldn't find the address and others got stuck in traffic trying very hard to be near their leader at the moment of his triumph.
A calm Vince Cable was pushed out of the door to make a statement: 'It has been a difficult day' he revealed to astonished reporters 'I wish I had never been born.'
With this he returned to the Party where excited Liberal Democrats were singing 'For He's a Jolly Good Fellow' to a beaming Clegg.