Written by Sidney Bollocks
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Wednesday, 1 December 2010

image for Former Lib Dem Politician Does It Again

Former politician, Limpbit Toothpick, has done it again. Having emerged from the Australian jungle (which is really just a bit of woodland behind Surfer's Paradise), he is yet again seen out with a gorgeous 21 year old blonde, with huge threepenny bits and legs all the way up to her Tijuana Brass.

How does he do it? Despite having a face like a smacked arse and the personality of an aardvark, Toothpick has bedded a bevy of beautiful women, excepting, of course, the Welsh weather girl.

A close friend of Toothpick reckons it's because of what lurks inside his trousers, that he has the luck of the Irish when it comes to the ladies. In fact, he told us that in 2006, just prior to Steve Irwin's death, Toothpick was in negotiations to film a wildlife conservation piece with Irwin. The plan was that Irwin would wrestle with Toothpick's trouser python, before tying it up, throwing it on the back of his knackered old Toyota Ute and relocating it to a more natural habitat.

One can only mourn another piece of classic television which never got made.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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