Written by queen mudder
Print this

Monday, 15 November 2010

image for JK Rowling 'paid Chandlers' ransom' furor
Kiss my ass, you Somali muggles!

Edinburgh - (Pirate Ass Mess): Did self-publicising philanthropisst and children's author JK Rowling pay Somali pirates to release Paul and Rachel Chandler?

A look of playful glee on her finely botoxed - er...chiselled! - features may belie the secret of the yachting couple's freedom.

"What a marvellous publicity coup!" Our Man in Modagishu commented today as the Chandlers signed up for a worldwide book deal on their year-long ordeal.

"Could rake in more $$$s than all 33 Chilean minors (sic) put together," a Foreign Orifice liaison person concurred, "with the Treasury's potential VAT receipts enough to spearhead a massive recession turnaround!"

The couple are heading back home to the UK where a huge welcome committee awaits them.

Daniel Radcliffe is 69.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.

Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 plus 3?

9 12 4 24
40 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more