The City is facing unprecedented pressure to come to grips with the Boils culture whereby Bankers are provided with huge Boils that are frightening to their partners and send children screaming over cliffs.
Nick Clegg, sporting his student scarf, announced that Bankers Boils were 'outrageous'. 'We must reduce them both in size and number' he told a student rally outside his Liberal Democrat Headquarters 'we believe the Banks Boils should be reduced to four Billion sometime.'
The CBI announced that the Boils Culture meant Bankers were seen as some sort of ogres. However if they don't have enough Boils 'they will go elsewhere and get Boils all over their bodies.'
The Labour Opposition, sensing public anger with the Banks, are all in favour of slashing Boils. 'They are ugly' declared Ed Miliband 'why should Bankers be able to frighten us all?'
Doctors have warned that slashing Boils results in a great deal of stinking pus. Noses will be put of a joint.