The Government Transport liaison advisory committee (GTLAC) announced today that the UK's major Airports are to be renamed.
A spokesman said: The tradition of naming Airports after Prime Ministers has lapsed in recent years and this will now be taken up again.
As a result Heathrow Airport will now be referred to "Nick Airport" and Gatwick Airport will be renamed "Dave Airport".
The Government spokesperson said: The word "Row" will be dropped from the name as it is misleading - as neither Airports are in a straight Line.
Luton Airport is to be renamed: "Horrible Airport" Whilst Bristol Airport will now be referred to as "Big Bristols Airport" due to its increase in size.
Exeter is to be called: "A bit out of the Way Airport" - cos no body can find it.
Manchester Airport will be called " United - United - United Airport" Whilst Liverpool will become " Walk on yer own Airport"