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Monday, 8 November 2010

image for Government to encrypt reflections across transport network
An example of the threat posed by reflections

A mirror wielding Al-Qaeda spy cell in operation across the British Transport network has lead the Government to request all reflections from windows are encrypted to prevent sensitive data being intercepted.

The cell targets travelling MP's and MI5 employees working on laptops during their journeys home. So called 'Snooper Troopers' then sit behind the workers and use mirrors to reflect highly classified information off the neighboring window.

MI5 Director General Jonathan Evans said, 'Al-Qaeda have spotted a serious weakness in how we work and have set about it like a gangrenous wound of hate. However, it is important that we don't let them win by changing how we do things. It's everything else that needs to change.'

It is not yet known how the cell has received such accurate information in relation to the names and journeys of their targets, but suspicions have been raised about last years MI5 Christmas party conducted at Laser Quest in Southall, West London.

'The guy was really pushy, asking for all sorts of identification before we could simulate laser death. We later ran some checks on him and discovered he didn't really exist, which felt re-assuring at the time.'

Home Secretary Theresa May said plans were now afoot to change all windows on the transport network over the coming months.

'This worrying development has left us with no option but to act. All forms of public transport will now have to comply with the anti terror measures being drafted. Reflections are a serious threat to the security of the nation.'

Reflections will be refracted differently due to subtle changes made to the molecular structure of the glass used, and will be converted into army recruitment adverts.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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