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Monday, 25 October 2010

image for Rooney Training for the Olympics
Rooney Training in Dubai

Football star Wayne Rooney is establishng a second career for himself. He is setting out to be a member of England's swimming team for the 2012 Olympics.

Aided by his new coach, THOUGHT TO BE HIS WIFE, Wayne has had secret training sessions in Dubai. He cleverly tipped off the press and photos of him in training have appeared in mass circulation papers. For once the 'Sun' and 'Mirror' were in complete accord with a front page picture of Wayne in action.

In a private call Wayne pointed out to me that his Diving is outstanding and may earn him a Gold Medal. He also gets a kick out of the Butterfly where he leaves others struggling in his wake.

'I have to fashion another possible source of income for myself' Roo told me 'I think I will be a knock out in swimming trunks.'

I asked about his new contract with Manchester United and he said it was not too bad.

'When I am fit the fans will thank me for sticking with the club. Anyway if I win in the swimming pool during the Olympics I can stay on and join West Ham when they take over the Stadium.'

I queried whether West Ham would be in the Premiership at that time. 'I have a lot of faith in the Hammers' declared Rooney 'they will soon show us all that they are one of the best teams in the Premiership.'

Predictions made by Rooney over the Olympics and his Gold, along with his assessment of West Ham may meet with fury from Manager Alex Ferguson, but Fergie is always good at seeing the funny side of life.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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