News has leaked out that Robert Mugabee secretly entered Britain last week and was given political asylum and refugee status.
He flew in on a special British Airways flight which then filled up with 197 refused asylum seekers who were being forcefully sent back to Zimbabwee because the Government said it didn't believe their scars, gouged out eyes and missing limbs were the result of torture, and Britain could not afford to take in everybody.
We understand Mugabee has been given a large council house, social security benefits and free access to NHS services. 120 policemen guard him round the clock and local roads have been shut.
An insider reported that preparations are being made for him, his 7 wives and 117 servants to move in to Chequers as David Cameron doesn't want to sleep in the same bed as Gordon Brown slept in.