Katie Price, AKA Jordan, has been found guilty of 'not being in proper control of her vehicle' at Mid Sussex Magistrates court and fined.
The balloon boobed bozo was tethered up in the back of her 7.5 tonne pink horsebox, when she became agitated.
Pussy Windbag, Price's groom and stablehand, told us 'she must have been peering through the grilles at the side of the truck when we passed a massive hoarding advertising Peter Andre's new television series. This must have spooked her somewhat, and she just reared up!"
The force of Jordan's temper caused the truck to swerve violently across the A23.
"The force of the swinging funbags caused the weight distribution of the truck to change suddenly, and dramatically," said Hubert Wonderbuff, chief road traffic accident investigator for Sussex Police, "the incident occurred just as the driver was entering a sharp bend, these factors combined, made for a nasty swerve to be necessitated."
"I must say the driver did well to keep the truck upright!" he finished, "what with all that silicone swinging about in the back, like two skin covered, pendulous cannon balls!"
After the shock of the incident, Price was given Ketamin to calm her nerves. She was then taken back to her paddock where she is said to be making a full recovery.