It has emerged today that Her Royal Trout, The Queen Elizabeth of Ye Olde England, has been trying to pawn her "rather elaborate and heavy crown" through several pawn shops in the London area.
Following a recent investigation into Her Majesties application for a poverty grant in which she cited herself as "a destitute pensioner having a spouse with learning difficulties and 4 dysfunctional kids" and described her living conditions as "one lives in a very draughty castle with a one bar heater which one isn't allowed to use after a recent fire," it has been revealed that the Queen has also been attempting to sell her crown.
A spokesman for "Lizzie" as she preferred to call herself when visiting East End pawn shops, stated that the crown was a little heavy for an aged woman being encrusted with gold and priceless weighty jewels as it is.
"Her Majesty was only intending on selling it to get a lighter one and yes, a result of that might have been a bit of spare cash. On the plus side though, Camilla will never get to wear it"
The buyer of the missing crown has not been revealed.
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