Written by Skoob1999
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Wednesday, 22 September 2010

image for Titus Bramble Flies The Flag For Footballers - Arrested On Suspicion Of Rope
Vajazzling!

Although details remain somewhat sketchy at this stage, we here at Skoob Sports News can confirm that we've received reports that Sunderland footballer, Titus Bramble has been arrested and accused of rope.

We're not quite sure exactly what the offence of 'rope' consists of, but that's what it said when the reports popped up on our teleprinter.

The arrest came after an incident in a Newcastle hotel, which was reported to the old bill by a 20-something lady.

Although we're not quite sure what this means at this point, we did hear that another man was also arrested.

Now, we're not intimating that anything untoward happened, but given recent history, two men, one of them a Premiership footballer, a young lady, and a hotel room - it just isn't a winning combination.

For some reason, the word 'spitroast' springs to mind, but we can't for the life of us think why.

It's not like Premier League footballers ever get up to mischief.

Rumours that the young lady had been vajazzled with a swallow design have not been confirmed. It's also probably just as well that the footballer's surname isn't Fook.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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