Today, findings have been released by the Association Of A-Level Students (Having Fun) [ALSHF], proving that English A-Levels are, indeed, boring.
The findings have been fought in legal proceedings for fifteen years, the British Government believing that if the results were made public they would lose most of the ability to tax students to Hell.
One spokesman for the Government said, "These [results] have been unreleased for many years, kept under lock and key through no fault of our own...well, maybe a little bit. But now they're out, we'll pretend we did believe they would come out at some point and change our policies to undermine these."
The hardest affected in this area is, of course, the poor tutors of English - working hard to gain a degree, then striking whenever their bonuses fall through.
Local contacts claim that the students, who have decided to boycot English altogether, are looking for other forms of courses...but not jobs. Come on, they're students.