Written by Nick Hobbs
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Topics: The Sun, Eggs

Monday, 27 September 2010

image for Proof: The Sun Says 'The Egg Came First'
The Sun, always talking shit, but people still buy it! Why????

In a wildly random and irrational statement The Sun has claimed that 'The Egg Came First'.

The so-called professional reporters used their usual level of tabloid journalistic skills to write the article, which was situated between a piece on Wayne Rooney having three in a bed sex with Sylvester Stallone's mum and Ronan Keatings ex-housemaid Nora, 76 and a story about 'Chuckles', the magic labrador from Leicester.

They reported that theological thinking (which, incidentally, they misspelled as 'theeolodgical') was often confounded as to whether the chicken or the egg came first. But in a twist to the age old story the newspaper spoke to Dave Edwards, a chicken expert from Luton.

Dave said that in all the years he's been raising chickens, they always come from an egg, leading to the confirmation that 'the egg came first'.

Faced with undeniable proof from their very own 'expert', The Sun was quick to publish the news that very day causing worldwide apathy. A friend of the paper said "they were well made up, after cracking such an age old question!"

However, Dr. Emlyn Wagstaff, a philosophy lecturer at Dundee University, told us "yeah, but where did the first egg come from? I mean, how was it laid, with no chicken about?"

We put this to their 'expert', Dave Edwards. He said "oh yeah, good point! I'm not really sure, I didn't think of that!"

The Sun was unavailable for comment as they were all out interviewing a high-class hooker who claims she was raped by Postman Pat during a sordid night out in a Soho nightclub.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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