Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 8 September 2010

image for Jennifer Thompson Has Been Asked To Appear On The Next Season of Dancing On Ice
Jennifer Thompson is hoping that the producer of Dancing On Ice waves the must wear ice skates to compete clause.

LONDON - The producer of the popular British show Dancing on Ice, Burgess Willowhouse, has just announced that he has asked the very popular prostitute Jennifer Thompson to appear as a contestant on the next edition of the highly rated ice dancing show.

Someone very close to Ms. Thompson stated that Jennifer does not know how to skate. One of the shows co-hosts, Phillip Schofield responded by saying that it would not be a problem as they can hire the services of one of the best ice skaters in the entire world, Sweden's Sven Svenfellow, to give Jenny a crash ice skating course (pardon the choice of wording).

One of the Dancing on Ice judges Jason Gardiner said that he has talked it over with fellow judge Robin Cousins and both have agreed that they would both be willing to wave the must be dancing on ice skates requirement clause in the instance of Jennifer Thompson.

The shows producer Burgess Willowhouse replied by telling them that he will look closer at the shows guidelines and bylaws and see if in fact, Ms. Thompson could still appear as a full-fledged contestant without having to wear ice skates.

Co-host Holly Willoughby was furious and she said that in her opinion it would be extremely unfair to wave the established rules and let Jennifer Thompson perform without ice skates simply because she is a gorgeous looking prostitute.

Gardiner and Cousins reportedly both told Holly to mind her own bloomin damn business and worry about covering up her facial wrinkles and her upper thigh cellulite and not be concerning herself with what sweet little Ms. Thompson will be wearing or won't be wearing.

In a related story. Word coming out of Buckingham Palace is that Queen Elizabeth has heard about the Jennifer Thompson 'non-skates' issue and she stated that she is all for letting the little lass skate her slutty little ass off.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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