Written by matthatt
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Wednesday, 8 September 2010

image for Rooney scores, proving removing whores' drawers reduces flaws
Wayne Rooneys fitness instructer showing him the ropes

England manager Fabio Capello bigged up Wayne Rooney's display, he also said that he was happy with the way he played football and scored on Tuesday night, his first England goal in a while.

The Manchester United striker is an integral part of the England team, even though it was 11 matches since he last scored for his country, on the pitch.

"He just needed to relax" quoted one source; it appears that the recent round of doing it with dirty doxies is just what the doctor ordered, allegedly.

Gone are the days when football coaches would command their players to forget fooling around with floozies before frolicking on the field of football.
These days it's all "fill your boots" before lacing them up, that seems to be the order of the day and it has proven to work.

"The statistics speak for themselves", said one football coach "just look at all the top footballers who are in the news for banging like a shit house door in a force nine gale. That can't be coincidence."

Make matthatt's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.



Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.




Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 plus 4?

9 18 19 7
45 readers are online right now!

Go to top