Written by Piemaster
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Thursday, 2 September 2010

image for "I didn't touch his helmet" claims defiant Hague
Room for one on top, Sir!

Today the beleaguered Tory grandee moved quickly to dispel Twitter rumours that he had secretly conducted an improper relationship with Top Gear's "The Stig".

Mr Hague admits sat next to The Stig on the front seat of his ministerial Toyota Prius but insists that nothing at all 'gay-like' took place.

With hindsight The Honourable Member agrees that it may have been better if he had sat in the back, or even had his own separate car rather than sharing with his driver.

For one, it would have made it easier to reach the box of tissues that is traditionally kept on the rear parcel shelf of such vehicles to mop up the odd premature ministerial ejaculation.

Jeremy Clarkson declined to comment. Not that he was asked of course.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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