Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 2 September 2010

image for Monica Mint Is Furious That Chloe Mafia Is Stealing Her Whorish Thunder
A folder containing intimate photos of Monica Mint and Chloe Mafia which are locked up in Simon Cowell's Bromley office.

SOHO, England - Famed 'Lady of The Evening' Monica Mint reportedly told her dentist/sex therapist Dr. Basil F. McPiccadilly, that she is upset, angry, and madder than a dairy cow with an inverted udder at X-Factor contestant Chloe Mafia.

Monica said that for the past few weeks she has been basking in the limelight due to the fact that everyone knows that she is to put it simply, a gorgeous-looking opportunistic prostitute.

Miss Mint has been interviewed by dozens of England's newspapers including the highly reputable Liverpool Scouser Gazette, the Manchester Morning Manc, the Portsmouth Pressed Poster, and the London Hand-Held Daily Mirror.

And even the highly respected English journalist David Frost called Monica Mint, "One of the most famous whores ta ever sashay down the bloomin' pike since that Christine Keeler woman and her call girl friend Mandy Rice-Davies back in the early 60s."

Monica has said that she hopes that the British people see this Chloe Mafia tart for the slut she is and vote her off the show. Chloe replied by saying that Monica is a perfect example of the teapot calling the kettle black.

SIDENOTE: Simon Cowell has stated that if Monica Mint does not stop her petty little jealous act against Chloe Mafia he will see to it that she is personally escorted out of the country by Scotland Yard's finest and sent back to Spain or maybe to the African country of Dutch West Wakaboonka where some of the uncivilized natives love to cook foreign born whores.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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