Written by Ellis Ian Fields
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Tuesday, 31 August 2010

image for Isle Of Wight Hospital's "Embarrassing" Security Breach
Polyester had time for a snack!

An urgent overhaul of hospital security was launched in Isle of Wight hospitals last night after a man was found to have "walked in" to an NH Walk-In Centre in Shanklin.

Sources close to NHS authorities on the island described the security breach as "embarrassing."

At the centre of the storm is 46-year-old Whiteley Bank man Milton Polyester.

He said: "I had a few days off, so I went for a walk round Shanklin and I saw this sign at the hospital that said 'Walk-In Centre' so thought I'd have a look.

"I went through the door and no-one gave me a second glance. It started to rain outside and I noticed there were some magazines lying around so I decided to have a sit down. There was quite a few people in there but I found a comfy seat and picked up a magazine.

"Then I noticed a couple of vending machines - it was a while since breakfast so I got myself a pack of crisps, a chocolate bar and a cup of tea, which was a bit weak.

"After a couple of hours a nice young lady came and asked me what was wrong. When I told her that nothing was, she asked me if I was waiting for someone and I said 'no' and she said that I should leave. It had stopped raining, so I left.

"It was very strange."

We immediately contacted the NHS on the Island. A spokesman said: "This is an embarrassing breach of security and we have launched an inquiry with immediate effect."

Make Ellis Ian Fields's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 1 multiplied by 5?

9 11 4 5
89 readers are online right now!

Go to top