Written by Jazz Jones
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Topics: Spiders, Essex

Tuesday, 31 August 2010

image for Man Tries To Kill Spider, Blows Self Up
Spiders are known for their wicked sense of humor.

A 28-year-old from Essex, England has suffered severe burns after igniting himself while attempting to kill a spider.

The man was summoned by his wife after she saw the arachnid wreaking havoc in their bathroom yesterday afternoon. Unable to reach it, he tried to kill it by spraying it to death with an aerosol can. In an attempt to see if he had achieved the heroic feat, the man lit a cigarette lighter to illuminate the room, but in doing so, ignited the gas fumes and caused an explosion.

A spokesman for the Essex Fire Service said: "He sprayed it first with an aerosol where it was lurking behind the toilet bowl and when that didn't appear to work, he lit up his lighter to spread some light on the situation as the bathroom bulb had blown.

"There was an almighty explosion which blew the man back into his hallway and lifted the hatch on the loft.

The victim was treated for burns to his arms, legs and face and breathing difficulties overnight and released early this morning.

The spider is presumed to be amused.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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