Written by queen mudder
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Monday, 30 August 2010

image for So was he shagging Anna Chapman?
Anna Chapman NOT wearing the rainbow wig found in Williams' holdall

London - (The Sting): Pashto speakers in MI6 refuse to be drawn on whether the dead cryptographer's multilingual talents included some tongue-in-cheek shenanigans with flame-haired treasonous KGB operative Anna Chapman.

"Don't know and ain't sayin'," Dorkins from Maghreb Section commented, "except that it all blew up with that Pope condom business back in April."

The suggestion that the Papal condoms slur by a Foreign Orifice jobsworth might in some way be connected to an international espionage ring probe has yet to be verified.

However, international intelligence agencies regularly spy on the Vatican because since 1948 myriad sessions of the UN Security Council have condemned the Church as a vast criminal organization.

Then when the news first leaked - just after John F Kennedy's November 1963 assassination - that George Bush Junior is Pope Pius XII's little bastard son the Establishment was rocked by the sordid horror.

A UN internal affairs probe once estimated that western governments had spent over one trillion dollars since JFK's topping on counter-intelliegence initiatives denying the whole disgusting Bush business.

Slightly less was spent on gagging Pius XII's birth ID as the Russian cult nutter Rasputin and the obliteration of Soviet DNA records showing his many descendants.

And then the whole disgusting business was quietly mothballed....for a very rainy day indeed.

Then just after this summer's Anna Chapman espionage swop the UK security/intelligence network was hit with a bizarre rumor that 'an ex-US president' had managed to sire a bastard son who had then infiltrated the British secret service!

"It's all bollocks of course," Our-Man-In-Kabulshit Brigadier Jeremy Woodlouse said today.

"Anyway, Chapman is an alias."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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