It has emerged that the Taliban came within a tribesman's whisker hair of shooting down the British Prime Minister's helicopter during David Cameron's recent visit to Afghanistan.
The news has sent shockwaves through Whitehall and a review of the British Premier's security in the region has been undertaken. Announcing the results of this review, Cameron told the House of Commons: "Clearly, it is utterly unacceptable that the Taliban can be seen to have won a victory over us with this attack - so we cannot stop going to the region. But at the same time it is obviously consitutionally imperative that the Prime Minister is kept safe at all times."
He paused - took a drink of water - and smiling ever so slightly continued:"It is therefore our decision that the Deputy Prime Minister, Nick Clegg, will undertake any trip which might be considered mortally dangerous."
Clegg, sitting next to Cameron, went white and wanly said "Hear, hear". The price of selling out the Liberal Democrat party suddenly became rather high