Written by Skoob1999
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Thursday, 26 August 2010

image for More Rain Forecast - Bank Holiday Umbrella Weekend Looming
It's Pissing Down Outside - Let's Go To The Beach!

With a bank holiday weekend looming, the Met Office is forecasting rain, a bit more rain, followed by thundery showers, prolonged spells of wet weather, and then more rain.

It will probably feel a bit colder than the seasonal average too.

And probably be a bit damp.

Not that the plucky Brits mind. Bank holiday weekends present the opportunity for sun-starved Brits to break out the fancy umbrellas as they head off to the nearest supermarket car park, or the seaside, or any one of dozens of theme parks - because the Brits love wet weather.

They thrive on it.

Only a true Brit would find romance huddled in a greatcoat in a bus shelter at Clacton eating fish and chips in a rainstorm to the music of a howling wind on a freezing March afternoon.

It's a very British thing - like dismal World Cup performances, bureaucratic nightmares, bad local radio stations, cowboy builders, telemarketers, traffic wardens, binge drinking, overpriced solicitors, online porn and anti-social behaviour.

There are of course those who yearn for the days when Michael Fish forecast the TV weather, and promised us "occasional sunny spells between the thundery showers and the icy north-easterly winds," but they are few.

So, as usual, Britain breaks out the umbrellas for yet another wet, windy bank holiday weekend.

Which is...

When they will congregate in significant numbers and moan about the awful weather. As they suck on fags outside pubs huddled underneath umbrellas.

While the rain persistently pours down.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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