The Governor of the Bank of England has written a letter. It was sent to Chancellor of the Exchequer, George Osborne but was delivered to the wrong address by a postman who was discussing the latest political situation with a friend on his mobile. We have been leaked the text of the letter and can reveal it exclusively.
'If you want inflation to be reduced stop blowing up your balloon.'
A clamp on private inflation is giving many families a hard time as they are the only ones being clamped. 'Food is the one thing we all need' said housewife Mabel Dawes as she tried to keep her kids under control at the supermarket 'but food is becoming more expensive. My old man is working four days a week so there is less money coming in. It is about time the Government did something about it. Why can't they stop blowing up balloons?'
The Labour Opposition has been vocal with Lord Prescott, the only voice being raised on their behalf. 'The price of petrol is rocketing and my Jags are using more petrol as I have to race down to London to have interviews. No one else is available to give the Labour point of view. Several MP's are studying offers from the Government for jobs as no Liberals or Tories are up to doing any work. These MP's are keeping quiet so they can remain available for Cameron's call. I'm not even an M.P. any longer but I am now Her Majesty's only Opposition. She tells me how grateful she is for my forthright comments.'