Written by Wreck-O-Mend
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Topics: David Cameron

Monday, 16 August 2010

image for David Cameron's Blood To Be Highlighted

David Cameron was reading a report at a committee meeting in the House of Commons and mentioned that he liked how some words had been highlighted in a new colour as it certainly got his attention when reading and discussing the relevant parts in the report.

So off Mr. Cameron went wondering why this new highlighter hadn't been used before and impressed with how different it was to the many highlighters he had seen and used before. He asked his secretary what highlighter she used as he would like one for use to take with him for future use. She looked in her drawers and couldn't find anything with that colour but suddenly realised what it was and told Mr. Cameron, "You don't need to purchase anything - just make sure you have a spot which is bleeding on your forehead; rub your finger over it and then over the words you want highlighted as that is what you did earlier".

Cutting oneself wasn't the best way to highlight items in reports so Mr. Cameron asked his secretary to get in touch with a stationery company called Ink Spots about manufacturing a highlighter to do the job. It was decided to market a highlighter with ink which has the same colour of Mr. Cameron's blood on paper and call the new highlighter range "Highspots". It is available in several shades of blood but the colour nearest Mr. Cameron's shade is known as Cameron Red.

A Conservative spokesperson said that it was a pity that the Mr. Cameron's blood wasn't blue but at least it wasn't the deep glossy red which Labour uses in its publicity. It is quite likely that Mr. Cameron would have considered genetic modification to the colour of his blood if this was the case.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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