Written by Herrdoktorfox
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Topics: Breasts

Thursday, 5 August 2010

image for Where For Art Thou?
Dolly Parton is considering working part time for Kira while her paintbrushes dry off!

'Artist' Kira Ayn Varszegi,34,from the aptly named town of Bristol, Conneticut is putting her sumptuous 42DD breasts to good use - as paint brushes!

Kira, smothers them in anything from oils to Hershey chocolate, then sets to work writhing about fully naked on the canvas. The resulting 'conceptual pictures' can sell for more than $1,200 each and her fan base is growing by the day.

Kira, who insists her work is 'fine art' positively insists that her many fans come and see her in creative mode and has thrown open her warehouse studio to one and all. Indeed, Kira is never short of a full audience who, surprisingly, tend to be in the older age bracket, usually from 65 years upward and every day the studi is packed to the rafters!

"It is so fulfilling to know that so many elderly gentlemen are interested in fine art" gushed Kira, "I try to vary my work greatly and am quite open to suggestions from my customers. Why, only yesterday one of my regular clients, Mr Richard Scratcher,89, suggested that I use my pudenda to create a softer stroke to the canvas. You know, Dick was right, the overall effect was truly amazing, plus I had three dang orgasms while sliding around on that canvas!"

Such has been the abundant and widespread requests for her work that Kira has drafted in an old friend, Alberto de Balsam, an extremely well endowed and part time porn stud, to help her create longer, broader strokes when creating larger canvases.

"Without Alberto I am unable to meet the growing demand" Kira told us, "Just watching him splashing his paint sodden attachment about really inspires me to greater things. Plus of course, Albertos presence has inspired more female's to attend our sessions and ultimately open their purses and wallets!"

Meanwhile, care homes throughout Bristol are emptying out at an alarming rate, usually immediately after breakfast, leaving existing staff very little to do until residents return, normally after 6pm when Kiri shuts her warehouse.

All local Banks also report a sudden upsurge of elderly customer withdrawing their life savings!

Kay Burley has just ordered a super de-luxe 'paint-by-numbers' box set from Hamleys Toy Store in Regent Street and cannot wait to 'get them out'!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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