Written by Herr Riballs
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Death, Old People

Thursday, 22 July 2010

Super sleuth reporter Herr Riballs has learned that Britain's oldest woman, Eunice Crabtree, has sadly passed away at 111.

Eunice, who lived all her life in Swaffham, Norfolk, once joked that the secret of her long life was "20 Bensons, Special Brew and a daily bag of weed."

Why?

Neighbour Dorothy Stoakes, 86, said tearfully "I'm still numb with shock. She was such a lovely neighbour and would do anything for you.

But what I can't get my head round is WHY she died at 111. She didn't even live there. Eunice lived at number 39. And she was only fifty two" she explained.

PCSO Tony Stockwell said "As far as we know Eunice didn't know anybody residing at one hundred and eleven so why she should end her life at 111 is anyone's guess.

The investigation is in its infancy but it appears she was friendly with her neighbours at 37 and the Thompsons next door but one. However, there is no evidence to suggest her being acquainted with anybody at 111. We would encourage members of the community to contact us with information to the contrary."

Developments

Local man, serial killer, Peter Toebin, was arrested yesterday after it emerged there has been a spate of deaths in the area at 111.

Mr Toebin who, coincidentally, lives at 111 will appear at Swaffham Magistrates Court on Monday.

Make Herr Riballs's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 multiplied by 4?

5 25 7 20
53 readers are online right now!

Go to top