Written by Lady Godiva

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Topics: Tax, Housing

Tuesday, 20 July 2010

image for British soon to face new tax if homes not adequately insulated
Government to add tax to draughty windows

Ministers are examining introducing new stamp duty penalties to force property owners to make their homes more energy efficient.

It could apply to millions of homes with old heating boilers, draughty windows or insufficient loft insulation.

British homeowners 'up in arms' over new tax.

Mr. Henry Pluggedup, from Thorntree, said,

"Christ, if we 'ad the bleedin, money to insulate our 'ouses properly we'd 'ave bleeding well done it by now. Stands t'reason.

Bleeding gits are after MORE of our money. Money tha' we don' even 'ave. I 'ates 'em all. A really do."

His wife, Agnes, added,

"Yes! I've a sister over in Canada and 'er government's just given 'em all GRANTS - GRANTS A tell yer this wi' no' a word of a lie...as God's me witness. Grants..to get the insulation done to save the taxpayers some money. They're goin' abou' i' in the righ' bleedin' way over there, as far as Arm concerned."

Neighbour, Nelly Snodgrass agreed,

"Yes, our Tony moved to Ontario 4 years ago and 'e just emailed me tellin' me 'e'd just go' a grant te buy a new furnace and some money to put towards getting 'is old winders replaced. And 'e didn' even vote coz 'e isn't a Canadian Citizen ye'"

So the British taxpayers really should think about putting such a proposal to their government before the new TAX is passed into law - or whatever they do to pass such things.

Move quickly, winter's on it's way.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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