Holland's footballing squad, so successful in the World Cup, unlike the Brave Brits, are in fact not from Holland at all, but Germany!
What is more the German squad is not from Germany but from Holland.
'It follows from this' declared war historion Sir Terrible Rees Mug 'that we fought the war against the wrong side. What a mistake. It puts a very different complexion on the history of the war. We really should have noticed this earlier.'
Meanwhile in South Africa the Dutch/German squad are being serenaded by Didgerdoo's, especially imported from Australia, to show the appreciation the Australian people have for the fine performances of the two teams.
FIFA officials are drawing up plans, should there be a final between Holland and Germany. 'We can't lose' said Frank Bonkerbore, the German hero 'we can change shirts at half time and no one will realise.'
'Or will they?' asked football pundit Jeremy Child. 'For years I have looked at the map and seen Holland become Netherlands. It is all double Dutch to me.'
A draw in the world cup final between these two teams would be ideal. The penalty shoot out is thought likely to become a world record with the final result unknown for weeks as no team is able to get a two goal lead.