Written by Herr Riballs
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Topics: Health, water

Tuesday, 29 June 2010

Millions of health conscious Britons awoke this morning to hear that the health benefits of drinking water may have been over exaggerated

A ten year study has concluded that the Great British Cuppa may actually be better for you than water. The reports' author, sales and marketing director of Typhoo Tea Europe, Graham Pomfret, said yesterday "the evidence seems to prove what we've been saying all along. You only get an OO with Typhoo. Our slogan was almost 'you only get an Eau with Typhoo.' That would have sent out the wrong message"

PG Tips supremo, Alan Phipps, 62, concurred. He explained "those chimps we used in our ads are as healthy as they ever were. Had they been drinking water all these years who knows what could have happened".

Water drinker Ada Evans, 92, from Salcombe was outraged. She fumed "i was spending a fortune on my water meter and was struggling to make ends meet on my war widows pension. "I don't drink water now" she continued. "Nettos own tea bags are dirt cheap and i still have money over for a small bottle of Bacardi" she beamed.

Water industry insiders were last night unavailable for comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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