Much consternation prevalent in the Hampshire town of Basingstoke today, following news that Polish employment agency worker Katja Smegma has dyed her hair blonde.
Katja, who once possessed quite alluring chestnut brown locks, arrived for work this morning with her hair a shocking, bleached white/blonde, with yellowish bits, much to the dismay of her co-workers at Big Rubber Dildo Manufacturing Inc on the Houndmills Industrial Estate.
"You could have knocked me down with a feather," Harry Rednapp, shift supervisor, told our reporter. "I mean, it's hardly typical behaviour for a Polish agency worker to dye her hair blonde. They don't usually do that sort of thing."
Fellow worker, Ali Bullo, a Turkish immigrant who once had a crush on Katja, and who also works part time in a kebab shop, told us:
"I no believe it. I don't know why she do this thing. It make her look cheap and nasty. Not like a nice girl at all. I am gutted mate. I go right off her now."
Machine setter Spud Sautee told us:
"I've never seen anything like it, personally. But you just never know with these Polish women. Who knows what they'll do next? Probably start wearing low cut tops, and low cut jeans that almost show off their pubes. And artificial suntans. Mind you - their musical taste is really shit. They'll probably all end up looking like Myra Hindley in that old mugshot and they'll still be thirty years out of date."
More craic from Krakow as we get it.