Written by Jess Mylocke
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Depression, life, writer

Wednesday, 28 July 2010

image for Writer of Story Doesn't Give a Fuck
Shite

A spoof writer (me) woke up this morning with the sudden urge to not give a fuck about anything any more.

"As soon as my feet hit the icy cold floor, I was overcome with a wave of emotion that carried me off to the sort of place where I couldn't give two Sicilian shits what happens next", she said.

Getting into her crap 1998 Renault Megane, she made the decision to not bother going to work - well, what's the point really? - and just sit in the car all day and watch the window wipers going backwards and forwards.

Make the dinner? Fuck that. Why bother - you're only going to shit it all out later.

No, instead she decided to take a bus to the beach and get a tan.

"I didn't bother taking off any of my clothes because I don't care about tan-lies. In fact, I don't care about anything any anymore", she added.

Even if the tide comes in, the writer says that she won't budge and cares not a teensy toss if she gets swept out to see and dies.

She might keep you updated if she's in the mood.

Make Jess Mylocke's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 1 multiplied by 1?

3 13 1 15
67 readers are online right now!

Go to top