Written by Jimbo123
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Topics: Parliament

Sunday, 6 June 2010

image for Fear and loathing in Westminster
"Save us from this lunatic!"

A maverick MP has dared to suggest an 80% pay-cut for all MPs in a move that has sent waves of panic through Westminster.

James Rose, English Democrat MP for Lewisham East is to arrange a special vote on the matter which could leave MPs 'dreams of avarice' in tatters.

Rose commented "The people here are like inverted ducks - lots of waggling feet but head firmly 'bottom dwelling'. £65,000 is a ludicrous amount of money for the difference we can make here. £13,000 is plenty since we still have expenses, superb pension, and lots of time to do outside work. All the important stuff is done in Brussels anyway."

"This idea of higher pay to attract the right people is nonsense - just look at John Prescott or Gordon Brown."

However the prospect of the gravy train being derailed has caused consternation amongst the old guard with tearful wives and families rushing to be with them at a difficult and worrying time.

"I've got silk curtains being delivered from John Lewis next week, how are we supposed to pay of that?" sobbed one.

Rose meanwhile has found himself caught up in a maelstrom of fear and loathing. "I've had tons of badly written hate mail and 'Scarb' daubed on my car. Someone even tried to make a petrol bomb out of Windex. Typical since they've got nothing better to do."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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