Written by IainB
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Topics: Language, reading

Friday, 4 June 2010

image for Reading School of Reading to clarify pronunciation
Is infinity the number number?

For many years, the Reading School of Reading has been the butt of jokes. Located on the outskirts of Reading, many people see the sign and wonder if it is pronounced as the REDding school of REEDing or the REEDing school of REDding.

Now the new dean, Sean Dean, has coming forward to explain to the public how it should be pronounced.

"The first word is the town name," he said. "So we are the REDding school of REEDing."

With the pronunciation now sorted for this literary school of Reading, Dean has been asked to sort out the pronunciation of the Polish School of Polish as well.

"One I've sorted that out," said Dean, "I can move into other areas, such as the manufacturers of the singing fish, Bass Bass."

Recreation Recreation, the company that brings back old leisure activities for the old; Refuse Refuse, the recycling company, and the vegetable growing agglomeration Produce Produce will also be targeted by Dean, in and attempt to standardise the pronunciation.

Even job titles are not outside his new found zeal. The men who stitch together waste water pipes, known as a sewer sewer will finally know which way round to pronounce his job title, and the court official who sentences prisoners, the convict convict will also be suitably reassured.

"Generally, it will be verb first," said Dean. "Such as contract contract, people who shrink projects, it's the shrinking that comes first. However, sometimes we have two nouns, such as the important month August August, where it will be a case of making a judgement call."

Many of Dean's colleague's think as his tenure is up at the end of the year, that he should resign.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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