BCB (British Corporation for Broadcasting) archaeologists have uncovered a previously unknown sitcom script while excavating a desk in the BCB London studios. The script was written in 1974 and is a comedy drama based around a police station. It is entitled "Mind Your Truncheon" and is thought to have been "too shit to film".
In the only surviving episode, PC Digby is investigating a murder, when he accidentally falls over and lands on the effeminate PC Tibbs, inserting his truncheon in Tibbs' rectum. This causes PC Tibbs to say very camply, "Ooh! Mind your truncheon!"
Later on, while interrogating a suspect, PC Digby leaves his truncheon on a seat while he beats the suspect into making a confession. PC Tibbs sits down on the seat with the truncheon, causing him to say in a very camp voice, "Ooh! Mind your truncheon!"
At the end of the episode, when the murderer has been caught and is about to be hanged, PC Digby accidentally trips and inserts his truncheon into the rectum of the executioner. The executioner turns out to be PC Tibbs, who says very camply, "Ooh! Mind your truncheon!"