Written by Jaggedone
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Health, Sausages

Tuesday, 18 May 2010

image for Eating sausages kills you!
Attention, Achtung, these things "kill" especially British ones!

Sausage eaters all over the world eating them and other processed foods are in danger, they kill!

German sausage eaters would normally be "high risk" because they eat, per man, the most sausages on the planet but being Krauts they have a solution for everything and that is Sauerkraut.

They do everything the best (well nearly), make Mercedes, BMW, Miele, Bosch, etc, and they also use sauerkraut for the perfect balance, much sausage then "schnell" to the bog and voila, no after effects, typisch Deutsche sophistication! (tends to stink rather though ol BEAN!)

As for the Brits they have no such luck, the poor old English Banger is full of processed shit and they have no "wunderbare Sauerkraut" for a rapid exit.

In fact the Brits excacerbate the process by eating soggy chips, baked beans, fried eggs and bacon with their sausages, deadly!

Our mediterranean friends also have no problems devouring tons of processed sausages and salami, they have olive oil, same effect as sauerkraut, only difference is their bogs stink and you have to stand up whilst doing the "runs"!

Britain you have been warned, continue eating processed bangers and you'll die, early!

Only sausage suckers who are not in danger are those lovely felines who love giving a "blow job" no risk there even the British ones are safe!

Make Jaggedone's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 multiplied by 3?

2 19 9 13

Go to top