There has been much jostling and re-organising going on at Number Ten Downing Street over the past twenty-four hours, but Clegg and Cameron have emerged with their new Cabinet.
"We decided to appoint people based on their surnames," joked Cameron, with a friendly arm around Clegg's shoulders.
"Working through both parties, we have found enough names to fill all the positions," Clegg added, removing Cameron's arm.
Phil Hammond MP, previously a TV Doctor, will become Minister for Farming Especially Pigs. Jeremey Hunt MP becomes the Minister for Sport, Especially Sports Involving Foxes, with Liam Fox put in charge of Defence Presumably against Jeremy Hunt. David Laws has been appointed Minister for Justice, while Eric Pickles has been put in charge of British Industry Especially Breweries. Vince Cable is now the minister for Innovation and Television, whilst Caroline Spelman is now in charge of Edukashion. Theresa May (or May Not) is in charge of Equality for Women.
And Iain Duncan Smith is in charge of Pensions, not because of his name, but because he is the closest MP to retiring.
"We decided this was a fair approach," said Cameron.
"And the ConLibs are all about fairness and equality," added Clegg.
"Would you like us to do the Fork Handles sketch now?" Cameron put in. "We've been working on it."