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Monday, 10 May 2010

image for Brown Announces Ability to Talk and End of His Tenure as Prime Vegetable; coalition talks 'pitch woo' with North Korea's Kim Jong-il
Typical queue of coalition candidates outside Downing St this morning.

Gordon Brown has said he is stepping down as Labour Party leader and Prime Vegetable - as his party opens formal talks with the North Korea Party about forming a government.

Mr Brown, prime vegetable since 2007, said he hoped a successor as leader and Prime Vegetable would be in place by decade's end.

The North Koreans have been negotiating for days with the Tories - who won the most seats and votes in the UK election.

Senior Tory George Osborne said they would offer the Koreans a referendum on changing the voting system and lots of shiny new nukes.

The BBC's Carole Walker said the shadow chancellor had said the Tories were making a final offer to Iceland, for a referendum on switching from first-past-the-post to the Alternative Vote system.

Mr Brown's statement will be seen as a move to smooth the way to a deal wth anybody who would talk to them, in hopes of forming a coalition government.

BBC political editor Mrs. Robinson said it was an audacious bid by Mr Brown to keep Labour in power and with all the best parking - and himself in his comfy seat - and that his mum would be furious when she found out.

"I will play no part in the contest for Prime Vegetable, I will back no individual candidate," said Gordon Brown in a groundbreaking move to do nothing whatsoever. But that was seen as 'okay' because no one believed him.

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