Written by Duff
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Topics: Cliff Richard, MI5

Monday, 10 May 2010

image for Peter Pan of Pop was once MI5 agent
Sir Cliff was wired for sound in '68

Recently declassified papers have revealed one or two surprises, the greatest of which is surely that Peter Pan of pop, Sir Cliff Richard, was secretly recruited by MI5 in the sixties as a frontline agent in the war against Soviet Russia.

Squeaky clean, Sir Cliff (105) was given the brief to release his brand of appallingly bland music to act as a smokescreen for his more nefarious activities. He was 'activated' when performing his Eurovision 2nd place entry, Congratulations, at London's Albert Hall in 1968. His handler, Col. Nigel Wyn, encouraged him to "buddy up with Johnny Foreigner" and see what he could find out.

What Richard, real name Harry Webb, found out hasn't actually been declassified so it's assumed that it was some pretty serious stuff. After he did his duty for Queen and country, Webb, real name Sir Cliff Richard, returned to the world of pop and inflicted an immense load of ghastly bilge on the record buying public, before being knighted for his services.

Sue Barker, one time linked to Sir Cliff as a potential wife, was remaining tight-lipped last night and refused to say anything to shed any further light on the matter.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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