Written by KendoMonkey

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Saturday, 21 June 2003

Lawyers from Mothercare today decided to take an injunction from canine "Bob" who they describe as a "killer dog". Bob, 6, has been visiting Mothercare since he was a pup. He would find his way in through a large letter box, and would occasionally tear into a tiny shoe or leave little poop-messages in a carry-cot or two. However, the Mothercare store in Liverpool, have decided that enough is enough.

"We've had it up to here with that dog," said Spokesperson Anne Marie, indicating a height of about 6 foot. "And it's a killer, viscious, nasty dog which will eat your children and probably your elderly."

Bob was unable to give a proper oral interview, but we were allowed to visit him at a local shelter, in which he is now imprisoned. Bob seemed like a perfectly nice dog, a little smelly perhaps, but nice, gentle and good-natured. This apparent inequity caused me concern enough to contact Miss Marie again.

"The dog is terribly viscious, I tell you. Once it nearly bit me! Well. It looked at me. And you could see in its little brown eyes that it was going to have all of my arm off! Well. Actually, it was asleep when I saw it. But still!"

The Mothercare lawyers are battling to have the dog put-down, which is vet talk for killing him. So really, people - who's the killer here, huh?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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