Written by Donnie Dogmeat
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Friday, 30 April 2010

image for Support grows for Monster Raving Rooney party
We *heart* Rooney

The latest General Election poll has predicted a landslide victory for the Monster Raving Rooney Party.

Party leader Wayne Rooney is set to be elected Prime Minister according to a Giddy-up poll published today.

"The Americans gave us George W. Bush and now it looks like we are going to give them Wayne Rooney in response," said the Giddy-up poll.

The Monster Raving Rooney Party has caught the imagination of a British public increasingly disillusioned by volcanic ash, speed cameras and Peter Mandelson's illicit smirking.

Launching his party's manifesto, Rooney told a group of old-aged pensioners posing as hookers: "It's going to be rough and it's going to be hard but, rest assured, I am right behind you."

The Monster Raving Rooney Party manifesto includes a six-point blueprint for future economic growth:

1. Borrow billions of pounds from all countries with smaller armies than our own
2. Sell Wales to the highest bidder
3. Give Scotland away to Greenland
4. Nationalise Sir Alan Sugarbabe
5. Invade the USA as they probably do have weapons of mass destruction
6. Buy Lionel Messi

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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