It is reported that the owners of Greek cafes, restaurants and snack bars will, from today, be sending 10% of their takings to the "You Better Shape Up" rescue fund.
Old humous cartons will serve as collecting tins as Greeks attempt to help the old country. Donations will be accepted in any currency. You may also use your PayPal account and all major credit cards will be accepted. Fees for using credit cards will be waived.
Travellers to Greek destinations will pay an additional "Save Greece from bankruptcy" tax. Ryanair will charge each traveller £5 for processing this new tax.