Written by bubblyian
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Thursday, 22 April 2010

image for Maggie to stand in election
Pretty feisty is ol' Maggie

The safe Conservative seat of West Fotherington today announced that their candidate for the forthcoming election will be Maggie, a 3-year old ginger tom cat.

Marmaduke Toryalltheway, Chairman of the West Fotherington Conservative party said,"David Cameron told us we had to select a female candidate and there were no suitable women who wanted to stand. In desperation, the only female we could find was my cat, Maggie, and she easily won the selection contest and now is our official candidate."

When asked about how Maggie would perform as an MP, if elected, Mr Toryalltheway said, "To be honest, she will probably do better than our previous MP's. She will faithfully go into whichever lobby the whips tell her to go into and won't argue at all. No local MP's have any influence over central party policy anyway as it is all controlled by the inner cabinet, so Maggie should fit in purr-fectly."

When asked about whether the electorate would rebel against having a cat as a candidate, Mr Toryalltheway said that he didn't think so, "after all most votes vote the same way at every election anyway and will vote for whichever candidate has their party colours without knowing what kind of person they are. We thought that having the name Maggie and a Tory party rosette would be sufficient to persuade the Tory party faithful to vote for her."

We await the election result for West Fotherington with interest on 6th May.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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