Labour moved quickly to snap up Mr F W De Klerk to replace Harriet Harman as Deputy Prime Minister in order that she can run for PM against Gordon Brown after the election. Mr de Klerk will also take over her job in charge of Equalities Adviser.
Mr De Klerk brings with him a vast knowledge of how to introduce segregated education, health and employment policies, which are a crucial part of Labour's post-election plans to extend discrimination and segregation between men and women.
A spokeswoman said, "We have been pleased with our progress at ensuring women's success in education and employment and want to go further in focussing our reduced resources where they are going to be most effective. Spending money on educating men is a waste of time as 95% of prisoners are male and 75% of excluded kids are male and they are simply disrupting classes where girls could be receiving a peaceful education if no boys were present."
When asked about de Klerk's role, the spokeswoman continued, "Mr De Klerk has vast experience of introducing and maintaining a system of racial apartheid and that is what we wish to further pursue in this country, except along gender lines. Ultimately, full segregation of men and women is our aim and then we can now utilise the Inequalities Act 2010, which was rushed through just before the election, to legally discriminate in favour of women and provide them with a high quality education and save money on educating men.
"We will convert boys schools into Borstals and keep them securely locked in to avoid truancy. Since most of them will become criminals anyway, this saves time and energy in the Police and criminal justice system by treating them all as criminals from the start."