London - (Larkspur): A filthy rumor on the internet has compared politicians' wives' erotic skills in the mixed herbacious flower beds.
Samantha Cameron and Miriam Clegg have both been pollinated by legendary TV horticultural pundit Alan Titchmarsh, it has been claimed.
But the truth of the matter is it's not Tits-Harsh that's been comparing lovers but doe-eyed Spanish beauty Miriam Gonzales Durante, wife of Lib Dem leader Nick 'No-More-Than-30-Shags' Clegg.
The gardening menage a trois among the hostas has been filmed for a BBC Gardener of the Rear competition to be shown at this year's annual Chelsea Flower Show.
A peek at advanced footage shows a scornful Mrs Clegg berating Titchmarsh's navigation skills in the notoriously tricky labia minora department.
Sarah Brown is 69.