Under a scheme to transform the village of Auchenshoogle Tattiebogle in very rural Aberdeenshire, Scotland, the Scottish Government has made a grant of £2 million to improve communications with the outside world.
The lure of highspeed broadband, cheap houses and malt straight from the tap has proved a winner with writers on TheSpoof.com. They are choosing to move to the tiny hamlet with no Post Office, pub or newsagents. The train does pass through twice a day and they have to grab their daily newspapers from the guard as the train never stops.
"It's a big advantage to have broadband at 50bps," said one ecstatic writer, " This means our spoofs will be online faster than others, it will be instant gratification. The technical side is rather too much for me to comprehend, with all this free malt flowing through me, but I understand the service is delivered from a street cabinet using a process called subloop unbundling. I'm sure I went to school with him!"
"Now if only Tesco, M&S and Sainburys would deliver to us stuck out here in the hills miles from the nearest shops."